HaiLedaBear, LedaMonsterBunny, Ledafknbanana. My Wish.

After a long morning, I sit in the afternoon, and decide to check up on one of my favorite youtubers: HaiLedaBear. A quick youtube search does not bring up any of her own videos. Questioning, I move on, and search again. This time, the first video that comes up is titled "I love you guys infinitely." There are no other links to Leda's actual channel. I decide to watch the video, and open up to a crying Leda with pink hair, pouring her heart out.
Twitter account deleted, blog deleted, all youtube videos deleted. Nothing left. Gone. All in a couple of days after her channel started to pick back up. Her viewers are left questioning, guessing, and searching for more answers. Looking through the comments on the video, I see many comments of genuine subscribers, sorry for her pain and sorry for her departing. I see unconfirmed rumors (that actually just MIGHT be true, but not confirmed by Leda as to my knowledge) of her and her family being sent death threats. I see many people who encouraged Leda to stop making videos. I see her being called "immature and stupid." 

Leda has a history of being hurt by these people. She made multiple "proof" videos on her old channels, the most recent one/two years ago. She was hacked multiple times on her channels. She once made a video titled "Wish" because people were getting to her, and hurting her. She was made fun of in the comments of her videos. Many people hurt her before, and keep doing it to this day, even after she deleted everything. 

Not only are her haters crazier than many other youtubers'. Her fans are also pretty extreme. Old pictures of her were hunted down from MySpace accounts, PhotoBucket accounts, and Instagram. They never stop. They want more, more, and more. They creep on her, discuss her past. They want answers to questions that came up but never answered. Nothing was ever forgotten with LedaMonsterBunny. Every move of hers would be found and published to other eager fans. At least now they came in handy. At least now we could be left with something of Leda, like a ghost of YouTube past. When videos were genuiner, when  she was happier. 

I loved watching Leda. I could watch her for hours, and I, too, was sad when her channel drifted off for a while. And I was glad when she started back up. Leda was my inspiration. She made me want to make YouTube videos, myself. Now, I guess I don't really want to. What is the point? The prime of her time, the one I adore, passed. YouTube now is not what it used to be. Leda was hurt by today's YouTube. I guess we can't live in the past, and have to accept that no matter how difficult, everything goes on. Nothing is permanent.

It does not mean that I don't miss the girl with the Pokeball tongue piercing, who taught us how to put makeup on while listening to Ghost Town (won't be able to listen to their music without thinking of her), wearing kandi bracelets, playing WoW, fangirling over the Lord of the Rings, and saving cats. I will. I wish her the best of luck. I wish her happiness and prosperity. I hope she finds what she is looking for, and I hope she will never shed a single tear ever again. I hope she will have many good times with her friends from the present and from the past, with her family, with her cats. I wish her the best. I will miss her.